How to Replace Self-Consciousness with Self-Awareness
Know your unique super powers
Going through life coaching and later becoming a life coach has taught me so many things, things I wish I knew much earlier in life, when I was younger and impressionable. I wish I knew then, that every person is made uniquely with gifts and talents! If you’ve ever experienced self-doubt and compared yourself to others during your formative years, I am sure, that you, like me, wish that you got this knocked into your head sooner rather than later!
I also wish that it didn’t take me so long to discover my strengths. I wish my younger self knew that she was naturally intuitive and insightful, and that she could have the confidence to speak up when she needed to instead of holding it inside until she exploded. I wish I could grab her by the arms and tell her that she was caring, compassionate and considerate. Maybe she would have believed it and honed those skills instead of criticising herself when she felt like she wasn’t a good friend or that she made a mistake. I wish I knew that when you hold your feelings inside, that is when rage sets in and I end up saying something I regret.
These tools I’ve discovered through coaching are extremely helpful in building self-confidence and understanding one’s abilities.
I wish the tools that I have now were available to me as an adolescent and young adult, tools to build up confidence in who I am as a person, instead of striving in sport and school with the continuous fear of rejection if I didn’t succeed. If these were the things we were instilled with at school I might've been less afraid of what people thought, and followed my passions, and enjoyed school even more.
But enough about my wishing well...
What’s your superpower?
The importance of understanding your strengths is critical. Speaking these things into life over yourself and others is key because the world is so focused on the negative. We need to keep reinforcing the positives in people. It is second nature to judge ourselves (and others), and praise doesn’t come easily. And so we need to make a conscious effort to be kind, to believe in our superpowers and the superpowers of those around us.
The coaching tools I have learned over the years have transformed the way I view myself, others and the world. I now know without a shadow of a doubt that every person possesses their own unique blueprint, personality, DNA and history or upbringing. This perspective has helped me to adjust my habits from judgement and criticism to understanding, empathising and meaningful connection. In my own life, this process has not been perfected, but I’m not chasing perfection either!
"Progress, not perfection" is how the saying goes, and I'm on board!
You have the power to change the way you interact with the people in your life. Being an intuitive thinker gives me the power and ability to see the truth in a person and identify their true potential even if they are not able to see it yet. Believing in and practicing this mindset with the people in my life have had positive results all round. My relationships have grown in depth over the years (remember, progress not perfect) and this gives me peace and encourages me that I’m using my super power in the right way! It’s an awesome feeling and makes me want to hone and practice and get better.
I just finished reading Girls with Swords by Lisa Bevere, and it reaffirmed how we as women have such unique 'super powers’ instilled inside of us already, without having to change or add anything to ourselves. We only need to recognise them, hone them and use them practically in daily life! Don’t wait for someone else to affirm who you are, start taking charge of your own strengths, identity and confidence and lead yourself.
You are not a victim, you are a warrior! the weapons you need are inside of you!
My War Cry
I’ve been afraid of putting myself out there as a blogger and creative type, mainly because my background is accounting and I mean really, how many accountants do you know that blog creatively and speak about their lives and their challenges they are facing? So I guess this is the first mould I need to break through…
This is my first blog post and quite simply, my hope is to be honest as possible with the intention of encouraging others to do the same. We all walk around with certain masks which shield us from hurt and shame. There are so many messages in our culture telling us how we should look, feel and act. And I’ve started to question a lot of these automatic assumptions over the past few years. Questioning is not easy to do because we all find it easier to go with the flow than go against it. It again shields us from the possible hurt and judgement of others.
So here I am, putting myself out there, despite my insecurities and fears of judgement and criticism. I know it will come eventually if not now. When you do things like this people will always criticise, they do so mostly from a place of fear. But it’s time for me to start breaking through this fear that keeps me chained like a slave.
I have been really encouraged by women I see rising up and speaking out about the truth, encouraging me to start doing the same! And I'm here to empower you to do the same in any area of fear or discomfort. Connection and courage are what empower us to take new steps and grow. This is key to fulfilment.
I’m encouraging you today to start the growth process of moving against your fear… sometimes all it takes is just saying it out loud to start the ball rolling, trust me - I’m right there with you.
Turn learning into action
1. What is it that is holding you back right now from take that one step towards your dreams and goals? Write it down now!
2. What is one action step you can take today to counteract that fear?